Warning Your Speeding Causes Other People To Become Fat
if this bugger doesnt start im not paying for it.
Houston i think we have a problem
beem me up scotty
i thought i would have just enough fuel to get home
bush and his fuel embargo
i knew i had a leak
should of changed the spark plug
BUSY TODAY.............
luv ya work though .thanks for the laugh
There was an Englishman, an Australian( )and an Irishman, who had just been captured by Sittingbull, and taken back to the Indian camp. SittingBull declared that the three men would be hung at dawn and then taken down, their skins removed and made into ceremonial canoes. SittingBull smoked a special pipe and said to the captives that it was a tradition that he would grant one last wish to each of the captured men before being hung and their skins removed before being made into ceremonial canoes. The Englishmen went first and stated" I wish to make love to one of your indian squaws". The wish was granted. The Australian went next and stated" I 'm gunna make love to every Indian squaw in this entire camp!!". The Wish was granted.The Irishman went last and stated" Arr to be sure to be sure, I'd be liking a fork please!".SittingBull, not sure what the Irishman's wish was all about said"Am I right in saying that you wish for a fork as your last wish on this earth??. "Yes that's what I said, you stupid man!" (To the horror of the entire Indian camp!)So SittingBull(slightly stunned) ordered one of his braves to go and get a fork. On receiving the Fork, The Irishman swung into a Maddening Rage and was last seen and heard Stabbing himself vigorously saying""You'll not make any Ceremonial canoe out of me you stupid Basta**ds!!!!!!
THE GIRL'S PRAYER
>
> Our Cash
> Which art on plastic
> Hallowed be thy name
> Thy Cartier watch
> Thy Prada bag
> In Myer as it is in David Jones
> Give us each day our Platinum Visa
> And forgive us our overdraft
> As we forgive those who stoppeth our Mastercard
> And lead us not into Sportsgirl
> And deliver us from Portmans
> For thine is the Dinnigan, the Akira and the Armani
> For Chanel No.5 and Eternity
> Amex.
>
>
>
THE BOYS PRAYER
>
> Our beer
> Which art in bottles
> Hallowed by thy sport
> Thy will be drunk
> I will be drunk
> At home as it is in the pub
> Give us each day our daily schooners
> And forgive us our spillage
> As we forgive those who spillest against us
> And lead us not into the practice of poofy wine tasting
> And deliver us from Tequila
> For mine is the bitter
> The chicks and the footy
> Forever and ever
> Barmen.
Who says the bomb disposal squad doesn't have a sense of humour??
What do you mean you didn,t do my @#%&@# edges ?